Madness Infinity
Madness Infinity
 PSE Bow Madness XS Compound Bow, MOBU INFINITY Sale Price: $499.99 - $531.29 See Reviews For This Product  |
 PSE Bow Madness 3G Compound Bow, MOBU INFINITY Sale Price: $599.99 See Reviews For This Product |
|
PSE Bow Madness XS Compound Bow, MOBU INFINITY Sale Price: $499.99 - $531.29 See Reviews For This Product |
PSE Bow Madness 3G Compound Bow, MOBU INFINITY Sale Price: $599.99 See Reviews For This Product |
Please critique the poem: Confusion?
Another strange, random poem. Hope you enjoy.
CONFUSION
First a fleeting instance
Of white chaotic madness.
The inner demons wake
To prey on one another.
Hidden anger flounders
And bubbles to the surface
To hail the sleeping monster
That provoke's the mind's attack.
Love and hate are tenants
Of bedrooms labelled sadness
Reality is fake, and
Cannot provide you cover.
Infinity is rounded
When doubt defeats the surest
It's hard to see the thin red line
Especially when it's black.
thanks for reading.
I like the rhythm, but there's one line that doesn't fit it - the second to last line of the poem has one extra syllable. Apart from that, I like it - good word choice with strong verbs like 'provoke' and 'prey'.
One thing - it's not 'provoke's', it's 'provokes' as it's an action, 's only comes after a possesive or 'it's'.
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Please critique the poem: Confusion?
Another strange, random poem. Hope you enjoy.
CONFUSION
First a fleeting instance
Of white chaotic madness.
The inner demons wake
To prey on one another.
Hidden anger flounders
And bubbles to the surface
To hail the sleeping monster
That provoke's the mind's attack.
Love and hate are tenants
Of bedrooms labelled sadness
Reality is fake, and
Cannot provide you cover.
Infinity is rounded
When doubt defeats the surest
It's hard to see the thin red line
Especially when it's black.
thanks for reading.
I like the rhythm, but there's one line that doesn't fit it - the second to last line of the poem has one extra syllable. Apart from that, I like it - good word choice with strong verbs like 'provoke' and 'prey'.
One thing - it's not 'provoke's', it's 'provokes' as it's an action, 's only comes after a possesive or 'it's'.
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